I have wanted to revisit Twilight for a few years now, but it always got pushed back for something new, spooky season around the corner, or just not the right mood for something I love but I know is not good.
That is the crux of these books – they are objectively Not Good. They are Young Adult, which I know means I should turn my criticism down a notch, but that doesn’t excuse some of the worst characters I have ever read in my life. Bella is absolutely pathetic. A completely helpless, dull, and honestly quite annoying teenaged girl. And that’s what I need to remind myself of – this is a teenage love story with a vampire. And that is also why this is terrible. It’s a vicious cycle.
This entire series, and nearly all of its characters, is made for those with premature frontal lobes. Edward is perpetually 17, Bella is 17, Jacob is 15/16. These are a bunch of literal children. Bella makes childish movements, childish obsessions, and childish decisions. How do you know forever at 17? I wanted to shake her over and over again throughout these books. Had I ended up with what I wanted at 17 I would be miserable or not alive.
When I read these in middle and high school, all those years ago, I was Team Jacob. Even then I rejected the blind, irrevocable love for Edward who gaslit and treated her poorly to “protect” Bella. Jacob was warm and came from a place of knowing her that Edward couldn’t have. But now looking at it, I don’t like him either. He is equally obsessive, boundary disregarding, and quite immature. He pushes so much on Bella despite her constant firm rejection of his advances. Jacob just doesn’t know when to stop, and he seriously doesn’t throughout the whole series.
For plot and story progression, this is actually quite enjoyable. That’s how I was able to continue. There are a lot of powerful movement throughout these books. What it does lack, is true action. Meyer sucks at a fight scene, let me tell you. And Breaking Dawn was so anticlimactic the movie was actually lightyears better than the book. Even though that fight was a vision, it was the culmination of all the tension that we never get in the novel. I also have stated and will continue to state that this whole series could have ended at Eclipse. A little afterward, maybe, that Bella turned into a vampire and lived happily ever after. Breaking Dawn is the worst case of surprise pregnancy I’ve ever seen and it resulted in a 500 page let down.
And throughout ALL of these criticisms, I had so much fun. I love trash. I watch trash relationship television all the time, and these, with all their flaws, are comfortable and cozy. Predictable, something to get caught up and lost in. When I read these in my early teens, they were uniquely mine. Twilight was a series that wasn’t prescribed by school and didn’t come from my Mom’s shelves (thank gods on both ends). I went to the midnight release party at Barnes and Noble for Breaking Dawn and I stayed up until the sunrise trying to finish it as quickly as I could. I got as lost in them then as I did now.
I completed the recent Cullen House Lego set and bought fancy dust jackets for my hardcovers many moons ago. I now display both proudly on my bookshelf in the living room where I once hid it on my “Shame Shelf”. A place I put the books I was embarrassed to have but still insisted on keeping them because I loved them. So I am 31, and I love Twilight. It’s not good, but I love it.
Thanks for reading 😊🌲🖤
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